Time better spent

It’s hard to imagine how lost I feel. I know where I’m going and where I’ve been. The signs are clearly marked as to what I need to do. The motivation is none to be found. My goal seems to be missing in action when I should clearly already be there. I’ve ended up in the wrong place once more. This monotonous dirge is all I ever hear. Am I truly so devoid of drive and ambition? This isn’t me at least not the person I planned to be.  Am I even here at all? Is this all just a bad dream or shall I wake up to find it has all been a farce? I have no regrets yet here I stand and stand and stand. . Yet I can’t find the strength to move. Nothing around me is what it should be. Am I too late after all? The table is askew, the cups are all smashed, the guests have gone and the tea is nowhere to found. The only thing left is this deck of cards clearly dealt to be folded. Where has the time gone?